“Nothing’s gone forever, only out of place.”

The insight of this simple line from the song, “The Place Where Lost Things Go” in Mary Poppins Returns can offer us a bit of wisdom during the often-bleak winter season. Indeed, its striking simplicity reveals a tremendous amount of advice about coping with loss and grief.

While this period is often called the “most wonderful time of the year,” it might come as a surprise to our national consciousness that for many, the New Year is not the picture-perfect season we all make it out to be. If you look past the decorations and beautifully wrapped gifts, you might begin to see the people and places that are experiencing brokenness.

Beyond the stats that suggest some truth to the idea of “holiday blues,” many folks experience increased anxiety and sadness around the winter holiday season.  There is an increased pressure to feel joy this time of the year.

With the close of 2018, it is evident that this year has been hard on many folks. From national political turmoil to the ups and downs of personal life, we can each likely attest to the hardness of this season, myself included.

Yet, an unexpected moment of insight and clarity recently came during a viewing of Disney’s newest film, Mary Poppins Returns. Playing on the heartstrings of generations, this new film returns the viewer to a world of childlike joy and wonder.

Though ample analyses of the film can be found here and here, I want to focus on a subplot that rings true and helpful for me in my work as a college instructor and pastoral intern in the mountains of Western North Carolina: the recent death of Michael Bank’s wife, the mother of the three new Banks children.

Throughout the movie, it is clear that the family is still struggling with the loss of their mother. In the grief and confusion following her death, Michael forgets to pay the payment on his loan, causing the bank to foreclose on their home.  The death of their mother has forced Annabel, John, and Georgie to grow up too early. Losing more than just her presence, however, it seems that the whole Banks family has lost its sense of joy and playfulness. There is pressure for them to pretend that everything is okay.

One night, after the youngest Banks child, Georgie, tells Mary Poppins that he misses his mother, she sings him a song to soothe his mind, telling him that his mother is not lost, only misplaced. The line “nothing’s gone forever, only out of place” struck me as a prophetic response to those hurting and grieving this season.

The way we are taught to process death and loss is often unhelpful. Though a common experience, many of us have been taught to avoid openly speaking about the topic. For Michael Banks, it seemed best to hide his pain and grief away from his children. He chose a stiff upper lip. Yet, as the film moves on, it becomes increasingly evident that no one in the family has really begun to process the death.

A clear theological response to death and loss does not always seem to be the most appropriate. Yes, for many Christians, the hope of a reunion in heaven does provide some comfort to many who grieve. Yet, what this song suggests is that those grieving not shy away from expressions of pain or hurt. Instead of avoiding the difficult realities of life, it is best to dive into them… together. Those who have passed before us can still be found in those around us and in our very beings. We are their legacy, their memory.

“Nothing’s gone forever, only out of place” offers a starkly different understanding of death and loss than most of us are taught. With this idea, Mary Poppins is making space for the Banks family to express their emotions. And, perhaps it takes the straightforwardness of a children’s film for such a viewpoint to be lifted up.

Following a bold attempt to save the house by the Banks children in a later scene, Michael scolds the children and bursts into tears, saying that he can no longer withhold his sadness from them.  A wise-beyond-his-years Georgie begins to sing the song from the previous day and afterwards, Michael realizes that is was actually his children who were looking after him. In their kindness and wonder, Michael sees his wife.

During this often-daunting season, perhaps we are each, in our own way, Michael Banks—needing to hear the creative wisdom of the Banks children. As people of faith, we are reminded that not only is death not the final answer, but also that we belong to each other. Those that we have lost are not gone forever, only out of place. Together, we carry their memory with us.