In September 2018, a group of religious and philosophical leaders from the Greater Boston area met at the Walker Center for Ecumenical Exchange in Auburndale, Massachusetts, for the first of nine meetings. At the end of our first Boston Bridges Fellowship session, four participants from Cambridge and Somerville realized we lived close together and that we could carpool. I offered to drive. 

Thus began a monthly ritual of driving home together from Auburndale to Cambridge and Somerville one Thursday each month. Over the course of eight car rides in 2018 and 2019, the conversations looked and sounded a little different each time. We drove through snow, rain, and darkness, every time with a tray of leftover hummus and falafel in the trunk of my car. We spoke about each other’s traditions, work, upbringing, and—most importantly—taste in music. Looking back, the individual rides felt normal enough, but each subsequent drive we became closer. Over time, a level of comfort and familiarity set in. I looked forward to those car rides each month. 

At the final Boston Bridges meeting in May 2019, our facilitator asked us to reflect on our experience in the program. We recalled sessions that were particularly impactful, shared our appreciation for the diversity in the room, and expressed a desire for more informal chatting time. Before I could offer my own reflections, though, two of my carpool peers commented that for them our “interfaith carpool” was a highlight of the program. It was lighthearted feedback, but it struck a chord with me about the impact of informal moments—those non-facilitated conversations where relationships can form organically, questions can be asked freely, and the radio volume can be turned up or down accordingly. 

The Boston Bridges Fellowship was an exceptional opportunity to develop relationships across traditions. It cultivated space to confront challenges, listen to stories, and share food together. Having this type of network and community has helped me to develop a renewed focus and grounding in my professional trajectory as a staff member in religious and philosophical college life; it has helped me create opportunities for college students to reflect and act on their values and to work toward social justice. Over the last five years in my role at a university chaplaincy, I’ve been reminded of just how nuanced and challenging this work can be, and I constantly navigate questions regarding how to serve as a bridge builder and work towards religious pluralism. Over the course of the Boston Bridges Fellowship, sessions have touched on developing a public voice, engaging in difficult conversations, and navigating intersectionality in an interreligious context; these are all topics I had been eager to discuss more with peers, so I was so grateful for the opportunity to engage. And yet at the same time, more than any particular topic of conversation, I found I was heartened by the opportunity to see the same group of people every month, to simply talk and eat in community together. Our growing familiarity with each other and our drives home together were especially meaningful. 

It struck a chord with me about the impact of informal moments—those non-facilitated conversations where relationships can form organically, questions can be asked freely, and the radio volume can be turned up or down accordingly.

At the final Boston Bridges meeting in May for the 2018-2019 cohort, we reflected on the idea of “forging a path forward.” Our instructor led an activity in which we considered nine different categories—Joy, Character, Partnership, Rootedness, Health, Creativity, Intellect, Vocation, and Horizons—that are adapted from the contemplation practice of feng shui. The feng shui bagwa chart and its categories usually function as a tool for assessing the energy in a physical space such as a home, but for this modified activity, our instructor led us to consider how these categories apply to our lives and where we want to focus next. 

Reviewing my scribbled brainstorming, I was surprised at how much I’d written in the Joy category. The last few years have been full of amazing and challenging moments, but I can see that much of my time and energy has been structured around vocation and intellect. I’ve been focused on growing in my profession and seeking out opportunities to develop new skills; in fact, my interest in Boston Bridges stemmed from my pursuit of challenging conversations and exposure to unfamiliar ideas. It has been a rewarding year, and I am certain I’ve grown as a professional and a member of my interfaith community. But what I didn’t anticipate was the joy I encountered in fellowship with my peers, and during those car rides home.

So just as each Boston Bridges session created an opportunity to connect—to relax over tea, to laugh on the Mass Pike, and to transport leftovers together—I’m starting the summer with a renewed commitment to investing in the things that bring me joy. I’m looking forward to celebrating family milestones, playing more board games, and trying new recipes. Because even as my work as a growing leader in interfaith conversations challenges me, it reminds me of the necessity of committing more space and time for the informal, life-affirming aspects of our work. It insists we delight in developing deep relationships with people from different backgrounds and in creating opportunities to cook and eat together. 

So while my monthly ritual of interfaith carpooling has come to a close, that joyous feeling of connection drives onward.